Color and rain.

Valentine's.

Saturday, February 14, 2009 1:15 PM

Gargh.

I don't like February 14th of whateveryearitisnow. I don't hate it, I don't despise it, I just don't like it. It's not that I don't have a lovelife; and I don't plan to just because I'm lonely by myself. Shheeessh. I have friends and family and my sister. Besides, with al those stories my friends exchange in the bathroom or whenever they cry because of a guy, I don't think I want a migraine.

I am NOT A MAN-HATER. Alright?

Anyways, after 4 months of endlessly buying books to preoccupy the side of my brain that will die of boredom without a computer, I have DSL! Yayyyy! Mind you, I wasted my savings for a pocketbook. Still, it was fun reading pocketbooks actually. Love and betrayal and such. Hahahaha.

Right now, I want to bash my head to a wall and order my retarded brains to stop thinking. Because thinking makes me nervous. Coffee makes me nervous, too. But I like coffee, so that's an exemption. Know why I want to crack my skull? Because, the guy I used to tell my secrets to, has a crush on me...I think. And I don't want any lovey-dovey situation thing. I just want us to be friends!!! The guy friend I had before him, also had some infatuation with me and we ended up fighting.

Because of me.

It was all my fault. *grins*

I wouldn't have fought with him if I liked the idea of 'us'. But no, I liked the idea of 'you' and 'me'. Separated. I don' want to fight with my current guy friend because I like the idea of us being friends. And, I still hold on to the thought that someday, that crush of mine and I, we'll be together forever.

Well maybe not forever, but maybe at least a year, or so. :]